yet another miracle!

I experienced a miracle this weekend. For the last week I've prayed that the speakers at General Conference would be inspired and that I would gain the counsel I needed. Friday I went to the temple for the same purpose (and also to gain inspiration concerning the direction of my life). While at the temple, I thought, "I am so tired. I just want to sleep. How much longer is this?" And then later I felt frustrated because I wasn't receiving the direction I wanted. As I was walking out of the temple, I thought, "How ungrateful I am! I longed for years to be able to receive the blessings of the temple, and now I am frustrated and sleepy and grumpy and don't want to be here? What is wrong with me?!" I was amazed at how ungrateful I was, and definitely felt rebuked for my ingratitude. Sunday during General Conference, the Prophet's message was on being grateful. All of my prayers were answered. (Well, not the one about where to move. But that will come.*) This was not all just coincidence. I know that the Lord prepared this for me. Amazing! I am so grateful!

*The more I think about it, I want the Lord to provide the way before me. I want to know not only where to move, but where to work and how to get a job there (and of course, it must be a really good job). And it all has to fit my requirements - close to home, good place to live, great roommates, strong LDS single population, great coworkers, easy kids, administration that likes me, ability to put down roots, etc. And I want all the answers now so I can start making plans. But I haven't done much work in it, and the time isn't right yet to make plans. As I was told two years ago, I don't need to know that information right now, so the Lord probably isn't going to tell me - especially since I haven't done a lot of work on it yet. So I wouldn't be surprised if it'll be a while before that prayer is answered.

best/worst

Best part of my day: introducing myself to the guy sitting next to me in church and really talking to him. Finding out that he's struggling because he's socially isolated, and setting him up with rides and ways to make friends. I felt so good! I am so grateful for people who are willing to help! They are an inspiration to me!
Worst part of the day: my roommate had asked if I would conduct the music in church today, since she was out of town. I did so, happily. I enjoyed myself. (That wasn't the bad part.) My roommate returned and asked how things went. I said it was fine. She replied that someone had texted her and told her that I wasn't nearly as good as she was. It's probably true. But it still stung. As Elder Maxwell said,"[she] could have gone all day without saying that." Now it's up to me to choose not to be offended, and to still be kind to her and to be willing to conduct the music the next time she needs help.


Do I do that? Do I watch my words? Do I make sure that everything I do and say, even facetiously, lifts others? If not, I really need to change. I don't want to be a stumbling block to even the least of the Saints.

be still...

I think being calm is sometimes a choice, but often a gift.

For example, today while I was working in the temple, my coworker was replaced by another woman. The new woman was rushing around and hectic and brought a sense of rush and hurry and frenzy. It was contagious, and I found myself beginning to think and act in that way. But then I thought, "I don't need to be hurried. This is not stressful. I've been doing it all morning without feeling rushed or harried; I don't need to participate in this."

 It took less time to experience than to write (or read), and it was so quick it was almost more a feeling than a chain of thought. I am grateful for that, though. I am grateful for the reminder that I don't need to get worked up about - really - most things. It's a gift to be calm and to share that calmness with others.